Relationships are complex and have their highs and lows. Even the strongest of marriages will encounter their fair share of speed bumps in the road. During these times of difficulty, you might find yourself wondering if you should get a divorce. This question is more frequently explored by married couples than you think, with 1 in 4 spouses considering divorce.
Sometimes the signs of approaching divorce are not as apparent as you would think. Typically, people associate the end of a relationship with infidelity, abuse, or other toxic behaviors. However, there are other subtle signs that your relationship might be approaching the end. We here at Myres & Associates want to help you identify the possible signals for divorce.
1. You Have Feelings of Self-Doubt
If priorities in the relationship are misaligned, you can begin to feel inklings of self-doubt about your marital status. Maybe your partner actively makes decisions not to include you, making you feel not worthy. In marriages, spouses can also directly put their partners down, contributing to feelings of self-doubt.
In these marriages, one partner can make their spouse feel as though all of the problems in their relationship are their fault. If your spouse refuses to acknowledge their role in relationship issues and causes you self-doubt, it may be time to end the marriage.
2. Neither of You Make an Effort
For a marriage to succeed, both parties must put forth an effort. For example, if problems arise in the relationship, one party may suggest attending couples counseling. However, this type of intervention can only work if each partner willingly attends sessions. It is frustrating when your spouse doesn’t keep promises, failing to put forth equal effort in the relationship.
But it isn’t all on one person to ensure the success of the marriage. You may also feel less invested in working together on your relationship. In divorce, both parties have usually contributed issues to the relationship. Neither of you may want to put forth effort into the marriage any longer, which is a clear sign of divorce.
3. You are Arguing More Frequently
Maybe during the beginning of the honeymoon phase, you and your partner never argued. If you start to notice more frequent arguments, this could signify a more significant issue. Your spouse may find a way to turn every simple problem into a full-blown fight, creating a toxic environment.
Think about the ratio of your positive to negative interactions. If you discover that your negative interactions outweigh the positive, it is a clear sign that you may need to consider divorce. Staying in a relationship where issues remain unresolved is not healthy for either individual involved.
4. Your Routines Have Changed
If your relationship is having problems, you may notice that your spouse is around less frequently or have less face-to-face time. Your spouse may choose to work later hours or take more phone calls while at home. Subtle changes in routine such as this may signal that your spouse is attempting to avoid the present relationship issues at hand.
However, you may also experience a desire to change your routine. Perhaps when you get home, you try to avoid going into your house for as long as possible. Maybe you find yourself wanting to spend more time with family or friends instead of your spouse, changing your typical routines. If you want to spend less time with your partner and change routines, you might consider a divorce.
5. Your Goals are Misaligned
Planning a future with your spouse is difficult enough, but issues can develop when you notice that you want different things. You can compromise on many things, such as paint colors or what kind of car you both want. However, certain life choices have no compromise. For example, maybe you don’t want to have children, but your spouse does.
When goals are no longer compatible, it is difficult to maintain the relationship. Furthermore, you should not stay in the relationship if you no longer want the same for your future. If you have reached this point in your marriage, a divorce may be the best option for maintaining your happiness.
Contact an Experienced Divorce Attorney
If you start to notice these subtle signs in your relationship, such as frequent arguing or self-doubt, it may be time to consider a divorce. However, marriages can also repair and manage to stay together after periods of turmoil. An experienced attorney can step in and assist you in deciding what next steps to take. Do yourself a favor and contact us at Myres & Associates if you are experiencing relationship problems. Our attorneys can help you navigate what’s best for you and your marriage.